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Weekend of Anguish

13 January 2009

Dear Jing Jing

Mummy is posting this entry on a much calmer mood than last Friday. It will be of a different mood and tone, one of optimism and faith in you, my child.

9 Jan 2009 revealed a terrible afternoon for mummy. KK hospital called and told me that the merged blood test and nuchal fold results revealed you have a higher risk of Down’s Syndrome. I was plunged from happiness to hell. Just on Wednesday, we did the nuchal fold ultrasound and saw you were healthy and even lifted your hand to scratch your head. Your reading then was 1:719. How did it dropped to 1:119?!!

I was in a state of distraught and constantly crying. I could not carry on working. Going home and talking to your daddy helped. To put things in perspective, the odds against you arre still good, out of 119 women who gave birth, only one is likely to be a DS baby. Daddy is sure Jing Jing will be the lucky 118 normal babies. You’ve proven yourself to be smart and docile in the womb, why would it be otherwise?

Talking to people like Auntie Joy and Auntie Jasmine who have been through the procedure helped. Professor Kelvin KH Tan from KK was a comfort. He and online local forums revealed that many women go for further amnio tests to confirm if the baby has DS. KK performs many such tests every day with high success rates and mostly good news are released to the mother. It seemed like something fairly safe to do. Daddy is even more convinced that you will be all right and prove the previous test results.

This is what I have to move on from now. Stay positive and believe the best will happen. I have to do this, otherwise I’ll go mad. Mummy loves you sooo sooo much. Please promise you’ll be all right and prove the tests wrong. I look forward to seeing you again.

Lots of hugs and love,

Mummy

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